More Onahole Reviews Coming Soon ™

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Sup dorks! Freaky Eddie here. This is just a quick write up to let you all know what’s in the pipeline.

Our investor at VGHustler pulled out. I hear we’re starting over on another website, as Otaku secured an affordable website designer, who made the wordpress blog, and the hentai-onahole web store. For now, we’re gonna be cross-posting our reviews on wordpress, on tumblr, and JLIST’s revamped blog. Publication of game and toy reviews, I’m told, is neither stopping or getting downsized, so I get to keep my job. Yey!

Let’s talk about the content you’ll be seeing in the future from me.

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We established great relations with JLIST while VGHustler was still operating. I’m now receiving monthly free shipments from the company. This morning I got this sex box from Japan. That’s right, a shitload of onaholes just dropped at my doorstep, free of fucking charge.

Not to brag or nothin’, but this mad hustle was made possible by my boss. The man paid me enough money to buy 3 onaholes from JLIST, which we published and showed to the retailer. I masturbated with the toys and reviewed them, and not one month later, I’m rocking a box of FIVE free fucktoys.

$140 worth of dick sleeves, all free. Here’s the receipt, note the writeoff:

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Dat admin override…

There’s a lot of merchandise on the table this time around, quite frankly I’m at a loss where to start. As you may notice, the majority of the toys meme oral sex. The two clear winners when it comes to quality are going to be the Virgin Fella and La Bocca Della Verita Advanced Fellatio Toy (Sujiman) onaholes. I’m most looking foward to riding these two. I’m also interested to see how the ANAL und VAGINA onahole holds up.

I have my apprehensions, because every review I read about dual holes has been kind of negative. Almost seems like the concept of having two entrances to the same hole throws off some sextoy designers.

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The F&F Bitch Bitch Idol!! and Blow Job Under the Table seem cute, and while they may be the cheapest of the two, I wanna learn how their quality is affected by the lower budget. The Ayatori Meshibe toy from my last toy batch was my favorite, and that was the cheapest in the set.

Maybe it’s some unnecessarily cruel and unusual business practices they use to make these lower quality toys that makes them so good. I just can’t stick my dick in a fake vagina without the knowledge that some poor, starving child lost several fingers to machine that pumps these fuckers out on a conveyor belt. Nothing makes me cum harder than knowing someone was covered in boiling hot synthetic flesh in a freak accident that the mainstream media covered up. Other than that, it feels good to be employed as a dedicated sextoy reviewer.

Definitely keep your eyes open next weeks, as we’ll be pushing shit out on teenxp.com, JLIST’s revamped blog, otakuapologist.xyz, otakuapologist tumblr. Once the toys have been tested to be safe, they’ll be added to the web store hentai-onahole.moe.

I’ll see you all soon. You can also follow my Twitter. -Freaky Eddie